The memory editing suite

Neuro-Linguistic Programming (NLP) has been described as understanding and communicating in the language of the mind, with a view to allowing people to change their thoughts, perceptions, actions and memories.

We will now share one relatively straightforward NLP technique that’s designed to dissolve unpleasant and unwanted memories. (Ideally this exercise will be facilitated by another person.)

Just because a memory exists in your mind doesn’t mean it’s fixed and unchangeable. There’s nothing to stop you from altering certain aspects of what happened in order to dilute and dissolve the impact. It might help at this point to imagine yourself as being like an editor of a film, where you’re in control of all the sounds, the visuals, the special effects and so much more. You are in control of the final version of whatever you produce.

The initial task in this exercise is to break down and deconstruct the nature of the memory in order to find out what parts of it are the most upsetting.

Is it the visual nature of the event? Is it the sounds that were happening at the time?
Is it a taste in your mouth or a certain smell in your nose? Is distance a factor? How close you were to another person? Or speed? Or temperature? Are there certain colours within the memory that haunt you?

When you have managed to identify the most harrowing aspects of your memory, you can either leave it at that (for the time being), or you can explain to yourself or someone else what it was about that part of the memory that upset you the most. Any more detail that you can provide can then be further explored.

Now is the time to change this part of the memory to something that will not be upsetting, and this is where you get to decide how to alter or modify it.

For example, if you witnessed an accident and you could not get the image of a red coat out of your head, you could make the scene of the accident sepia or monochrome, or make the colours paler or washed out. If it was the sound of a car crashing, you could replace this noise with some music or a different sound that is in no way distressing, such as a heavy shower of rain. Or you could make the sounds go quieter or mute. If you were too close to the event, you could zoom back so that the event now takes place from a distance.

This approach can help to keep the memory from returning and upsetting you, but if it does return, you can always repeat the exercise and maybe revisit different features of the memory that you wish to further change.